Happy Birthday, Scout!

May 16 2012

My little perfect munchkin! Today is your birthday! Let me tell you exactly how everything happened.

After I was admitted into the hospital, I had zero pain issues! You were just hanging out, taking your time getting here. At exactly midnight on May 16, I had my first EXTREMELY painful contraction. It wasn't totally unbearable, though. Just hard. I figured it was a fluke so I kept the light off in order to let your dad sleep. He stayed the night last night and this night despite all the stuff he needed to get done with work and his car dealership.

The next contraction came 5 minutes later.Then another, another, all 5 minutes apart, each more and more difficult to endure and more painful than the last. I breathed quietly through those with tears in my eyes, hoping not to wake your dad still (he's a pretty heavy sleeper, luckily!). I was hooked up to a few things. Since you are early, the risk of infection is a much higher risk pre-birth, so they hooked my left arm to a clear maintenance fluid and two alternating kinds of antibiotics to help fight off any potential infections. This was probably one of my least favorite parts. I really don't like needles, especially one that gets to stay shoved into my wrist for a few days. These medicines also made my left kidney fight a little harder to filter and process things which meant I could only lie on my right side or straight up - otherwise it felt like someone was kidney-punching me. OUCH! On my tummy there were two monitors: one monitoring your sweet, strong heartbeat. The other was monitoring my stomach movements. The nurses could see any movement of both monitors from their nurse station - HOWEVER, for some reason, probably because my tummy monitor slipped off where it could detect properly, they werent picking up my contractions at their station. I had a thought to call the nurse in. She came in and asked about my pain level. I told her when i wasnt contracting i was at a zero but when I contracted the pain shot up to a 7. She made the decision to call in the guy who does the epidural. He had gone home for the night because they were sure  I wasn't going to go into labor that night. It was about 1 am by this point, one hour had slipped by that I'd quietly suffered through these contractions. I cried through a couple of the last ones of the hour - not really because of pain, but because I think I was so overwhelmed with the thought of you coming so early, with hopes that you'd come out okay with no real problems, and that I feel like I'm not quite adequate yet to be able to take care of such a sweet little soul that's just been with our heavenly father in such a pure place.

Although I was emotional for this, I always ended up with a calming, totally assured feeling that you woere going to be tough, strong, okay.

FINALLY the epidural guy came. I had to sit on the edge of the bed, hunched over for 15 minutes while he prepared my back, which meant 3 more really intense contractions came and went. I had to be extremely still during all of this which was quite difficult. Somehow he managed to slip an enormous needle and wire into my spine inbeteween contractions when I wasn't tense. I was able/blessed to feel one more contraction before my feet started to tingle - kind of like when your face starts to go numb at the dentist's office and soon enough my legs and feet were jello-ey sand bags! I say BLESSED to feel the last contraction because, looking back on the experience, I am glad I got to feel everything for a little while. Im glad I coul dfeel what God intended childbirth to feel like. There's something so special and precious that really unexplainable - especially considering how tremendous the pain was. It somehow makes me love you that much more - to go through the pain for YOU.

The nurse told us you wouldnt be coming for another 6-12 hours and that we should get some sleep. It was about 2:30 am when she told us and since the entire labor and delivery floor only had one other patient, your daddy was able to use the room next door and used it as his own personal hotel room. Your gma+gpa wakefield and uncle jared stopped in right after i got my epidural, but we sent them home until it was time for you to come. I as only dialated at a 4 anyway. So, your dad went to sleep and I totally fell into a deep sleep on my LEFT side (since I couldnt feel the kidney pain!! hooray for hospital drugs!) and had the best sleep i'd had since before I was pregnant.

Before I knew it, my night nurse's shift was almost over and she checked to see how dilated i was...and to her surprise i was at a 9! She called Dr. Hoggard to come to the hospital. It was about 530am and I could feel my feet start to tingle - which meant my   epidural was starting to wear off (YIKES)...i started feeling pressure every time I contracted, so I could tell you were coming soon! Dr. Hogardd got "stuck in construction traffic" so he didnt show up until about 6:25! I was quietly saying bad words at him in my head while I was waiting because I was a little scared you might come out with out hum!! Before the doctor got there, your dad got to reach in and feel the top of your sweet head before you were born. This totally caught me by surprise because he'd been acting kind of squeamish during the whole process.

Once the doctor got there, I went through about 4 contractions. On the final push (I think push #5) your teeny head, shoulders, and the rest of your tiny body was out to greet the world! You took about 5 seconds before you let out a sweet, feminine cry. You cried for about 15 seconds, and then they took you to the corner of the room to clean you up. Your daddy took pictures of that. They weighed you and measured you. I waited paitently to be able to hold you. It felt like hours but was more like 20 minute. Finally they put you - all 4 lbs 14 tiny oz of you - into my arms. You were so quiet, so peaceful, and I couldn't really speak. Your beautiful eyes were blinking heavily, probably adjusting to such a big, bright world, figuring out your new life. Then I said to you, "hi sweet girl!" in an excited but gentle and soft voice. Your eyes fixated on mine and an overwhelming feeling of love enveloped me and I'm positive you felt something similar. After 5 minutes, your dad stood patiently waiting to get his first moment with you. Your grandparents - Wakfields AND Cosletts (Who drove ALL the way from Texas to be here for your birth!!) naughtily stood outside my hospital room door, ears pressed against it to hear anything they could, and I think they got a glimpse of you on your way out. The nurses cleaned me up and let your grandparents in (your two aunts were very sick so they couldnt be there) - I was suprisingly not very tired and welcomed the visitors. We talked for about 30 minutes, then your sweet grandmas realized I didnt have any preemie supplies! Or a lot of baby needs in general for you! They divided and conquered duties and both families left to get supplies for you. I just love so much that they were so willing to do that for us. You really have no idea how blessed you are to have TWO amazing sets of grandparents.

They left and I was moved down to the postnatal unit downstairs since I could now feel my legs. It was around 9am. The nurses helped my body adjust and get cozy in my hospital bed. I was hoping to get a little rest since they wouldnt let me go be with you yet, but hospital staff kept coming in with paperwork, instructions, taking my vital signs, checking my tire, sore body. Finally, around 11 am, I was able to rest uninterrupted for about 2 hours. The lactation specialist came in around 1 to teach me how to breast pump for you! While she was talking to me, your dad, gma and gpa wakefield got to visit you for a bit. Once they left , I finally was able to come see you! You were so perfect and tiny. Since you are near perfect (no lung issues, no internal issues, just teeny - which isn't usually the case with babies 6 weeks early. You're so tough!) They let us hold you. Right now, it's 4 in the morning after your birthday and Im a smidge tired so I will continue this update tomorrow.


I LOVE YOU SCOUT WAKEFIELD!
Love,
Mommy